David v. SEC

Blessed we are to have a seminal moment in week 1, when the SEC faces a critical out of conference matchup. No, I’m not referring to the game in Jerry World that matches up what could very well be the best two teams in the nation. My focus Saturday will be at the Georgia Dome when Boise State comes to visit (and yes, it is a home game for them) UGA.

In January 2007, the landscape of college football changed in two separate games played in the same stadium. Little known (outside of gamblers) Boise State capped a dream season by not only beating mighty Oklahoma, but did so in a manner that would top the most creative screenplay Hollywood could offer. Days later, Florida defied all experts and pummeled #1 Ohio State in the national title game.

Since that month, Boise State has become the poster child for all ‘daywalker’ college football fans, and sportswriters (especially those in the northeast). They’ve continued to put together impressive seasons year after year, and every pundit hoping to turn God’s Sport into the NFL uses their program as the biggest reason college needs a playoff.

SEC fans, never ones to feel inferior about their product, have enjoyed the golden years by seeing the crystal ball stay in conference for 5 straight years. There have been countless arguments about why the SEC has dominated (team speed, great coaching, cheating), but there is no doubt that the game in Glendale in 2007 is Exhibit A as to why your shitty conference sucks.

Last year Boise would have lost its statement game had Va Tech not decided to integrate the Les Miles Clock Management System, and the Bob Pruett Bend Don’t Break Defense. However, they did pull it out, and gave us 10 weeks of Bob Ryan-types whining about the system until Nevada thankfully restored order.

This year is different. Boise plays the SEC. Not just Georgia, but the SEC. A win over perhaps the 6th best team in the conference, and the madness will start again. Of course, SEC fans thinks even Ole Miss can pound Boise State using a team comprised of the first 11 frat boys with Ducks Unlimited stickers on their Z71’s driving 18 mph past the Grove.

The stakes are high – Richt’s job, the SEC’s reputation, a possible trip to New Orleans for Boise. How does it look?

Matchups:

Coaching: Boise State is the clear winner here. Chris Peterson is not only one of the best game day coaches, he is also one of the best game week coaches. His teams execute better than anyone in the country, and they are fundamentally sound in all facets. Richt coaches well when expectations are low, but seems to fold in critical games, and against teams wearing Orange and Blue. Uh-oh.

Advantage: BSU

Boise St Offense vs UGA Defense: The Broncos return their QB, 2 RB’s, and 3 lineman. They lost 2 very good wideouts, but Kellen Moore is simply fantastic in this offense, and only Case Keenum has more experience at this position. Georgia returns 7 starters from a shaky unit that was under a new scheme last year. Year 2 typically yields better results, and they had better since Richt has gone all in with the 3-4. Few WAC teams use the 3-4, and none do so with linebackers as big and fast as the Bulldawgs. Can Moore distinguish which guys are rushing, and who is in coverage? The game may very well hinge on this.

Advantage: BSU

UGA Offense vs BSU Defense: Aaron Murray has been described as – “being a very good for his age”, “having great potential”, and “not Joe Cox”. He has the tools, but he had better since they are starting a 4 year old at tailback, and are a hot mess along the line. Charles and King will be the most talented eligible receivers BSU will have to cover this year. Boise is athletic and fast, but undersized on the D-line. They have always succeeded in disguising coverages and blitzes, and I expect that to continue. They should be able to get pressure on the edges, but can they stop the run?

Advantage: UGA

Special Teams: Boise is breaking in a new kicker, punter and returner. UGA is returning senior starters at all three.

Advantage: UGA

Coeds:  Really?  BSU is bringing a #2 pencil to a gunfight.

Advantage: UGA 

Winner: UGA 24-17.

 -Ocular Patdown

CHANNELLING THE INNER CHUCK JONES

THE Big-10 (12?) Preview:

Personality profiles are utilized by many: employers, marketers, serial-killer chasers, but rarely has it been used to define a conference. If we do so loosely call the Big 10 (12?) a conference, then each team’s prospective gridiron wealth may be determined with nary a gander at last year’s record, or analysis as to whether there is a returning quarterback, or returning coach, or pre-season all conference selections, but instead by who they are.

In judging character, we may compare by using the best caricatures. There was no better cartoon group in creating full-blown one-dimensional personalities than the classic Warner Brothers group in the middle of the last century. What better characters to define, therefore, a completely one-dimensional league. Listed in order of predicted finish, Legends and Leaders be damned:

  

The new guy on the block is actually, in football success terms, the oldest. The Huskers have really found a home with this conference in that they fit well in overall game-philosophy: Stop teams from scoring and score only if necessary to win. Like their galliform brother, the sit rather tall and talk (albeit with a drawl) with some confidence, when in reality the foundation of their perceived success is quite fragile. While the Texas and Florida programs can overcome coaching and personnel issues because of their great locations / facilities, Lincoln, NE is nobody’s destination place. They are plugging along fine with a solid coach….but the terrain is rocky.

Prediction: 10-2. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

Nobody really believes that all that Badger students do is drink beer and eat cheese.  You do?  Well, so do I.  That malaise helps explain why seeming annual teams with strong defense and strong running games consistently poop out at some point and fall woefully under expectations.  Should we believe in Wisconsin?  Certainly not, but the sun don't shine on the same dog's ass every day, so eventually the Badger will get their shot.  By wasting away at the bar, however, they will miss another golden opportunity.

Prediction: 10-2. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

Which bird looks meaner to you?  We never expect much from Iowa and why would we?  They have almost nothing going for them, except an exceptional coach.  The location is lousy and there is no recruiting base.  Yet, like their yellow diminutive counter-part, they constantly surprise through crafty smart players and dogged overachievement.  Where does that take them this year?  The same place it takes them every year, to the Outback Bowl.

Prediction: 10-2. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

                                         


I can appreciate the desire to win just like anyone else.  But the Buckeyes cut a swath through the NCAA rulebook like few schools have.  Now obscured by the fine work of Nevin Shapiro, one must not overlook the pioneering Jim Tressel in the annals of really shitty decisions.  Nevertheless, that cheating left the cupboard rather full and, with another fine recruiting class, the Buckeyes can't slip that far down.  This much whirling, spinning reckless damage must show up somewhere, however.

Prediction: 9-3. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

Ah, the classic little brother syndrome. Perhaps the easiest program to diagnose, they sit constantly in their big-brother's shadow in football hungry Michigan.  The last several years would have been a golden opportunity to grasp the Big-Ten mantle while proud Michigan slowly burned.  However, like the obstinate duck they resemble, they instead make few moves in real improvement, linger around at "solid" program status and remain a distant second fiddle to the star of the show.  They not only trail Michigan (who will return), but also trail now two more programs who control their states.  The future, therefore, is far from bright.

Prediction: 8-4. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

    We keep expecting this former juggernaught to perform.  They tease and tease and tease.  This year's Michigan unit is released finally from Junior PeeWee football philosophies, yet we have no real idea if they have the right coach.  This particular school will always be able to recruit with a certain eye toward success, but is what is left on the roster capable of running a pro-style offense.  Michigan fans should not have to wait much longer for a consistent winner.  This team cannot get by with glimpses of competence, only to get crushed when facing competition of similar or greater quality.  They will have to perform when the curtain is up, and the lights are on.

 Prediction: 8-4. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

There is no getting around it, Penn State has an image issue.  The rest of the country is hiring cutting edge coaches who are young and innovative, yet Joe Pa (between yearly hip surgeries, mind you), still patrols the sidelines (or the booth).  His name will attract some recruits, but the best names are leaving the Northeast and going south or west.  The players he has are not even good enough to beat, say, the worst Florida Gator team since 1989.  Although the program has some pride and can bow up when it wants to, it cannot get bombed again by Bama and not have it sting.  More of the same.

Prediction: 7-5. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

                                 
Everything is sold as gold in Champaign, but something just doesn't smell right.  Expect this program to be the subject of the next great Yahoo Sports Expose.  But don't worry, there is a mean pepper steak served every Tuesday at the Joliet pen.  The Fighting Zookers sometimes bite back against equal to lesser opponents, but typically they will lose to those they should lose to and lose to some they should not.  Nevertheless, there is a weak enough schedule and just enough remaining talent that should keep the Illini bowl eligible.  Zook may find a way to screw that up, however.

Prediction: 7-5. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

   If they are such geniuses, then why aren't they better?  Like the  wonderfully wise Marvin the Martian, the Cats have enough resolve to out think they opposition, but do not have the physicality (is that really a word?) to match the Big-Ten's other more impressive programs.  Case in point is our guest from the Astronomy Department at Northwestern.  His name is Nathaniel Stern.  Part of his course of study emphasizes the electroweak sector of the Standard Model, as well as searches for new particles and new phenomena.  They have measure the production of W and Z bosons which mediate the weak interactions - this is the gateway to the exciting studies of the top quark and, possibly, the discovery of the Higgs Boson.  Any more questions why they stink? 

Nathaniel (Nate, to non-friends) Sterns' Prediction: 

Prediction: Do you really want me to calculate the odds and make predictions?  I am a scientist and I can only make predictions on any number of possiblities.  The possible scenarios are in the millions.  Take for instance the possibility of an injury to the quarterback in the second series of the first quarter....that would make the odds of winning that particular game go down by 37%...and, think about this.....click.

OUR prediction: 6-6. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst scenario: 0-12.

Like our erstwhile engineer of the valley, this mercurial program in Indiana has surprisingly been somewhat of a quarterback feeding ground for the NFL for some time.  You just know that many of their graduates are directly responsible for manufacturing many of the ACME products used to mixed results by Coyote.  Like Coyote, who is rather ingenius in theory, but poor in execution, the Purdue Boilermakers have settled into the mediocre-to-poor program status for which they truly belong.  This season's entry shows no signs of screwing up that master plan.

Prediction: 5-7. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

This program is all bluster.  They have spend a fair amount of money in recent years building a new stadium and hiring and firing coaches because they truly feel like they should be among the big-boys in college football.  Like the pint-sized gunslinger, they are always seeking to show they belong in the conversation of top programs, so much so that they have come under the considerable thumb of the NCAA in recent years.  But, lets face it, how well could a recruiting visit go in Minnesota?  If you want to play football and go to college on the Hoth System, please sign up today!

Prediction: 3-9. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

         Bringing up the rear is the one program that cannot even point to a modicum of success in the last 30 years or so.  Like the befuddled hunter, they fumble around and rarely make any noise, confused about whether they even want to compete in football.  In Indiana, kids learn farming, school and basketball, probably in that order.  There is no reason, this season or any season, to think that the Hoosiers will do anything other than beat the directional schools on their schedule.

Prediction: 2-10. Best case scenario: 12-0. Worst case scenario: 0-12.

~Stan Gable ~

B1G Preview...

will be delayed until tomorrow.  Please insert team speed joke here (______________).

In the meantime, enjoy

Ocular Patdown

The Great Divorce

With greatest respect to C.S. Lewis…

The humidity still hangs heavy in the air and practices are taking place early or late in the day.  Players tire of two-a-days, coaches desperately attempt to add more formations and starters try to erase all doubts from their position coach.

While the season may be just around the corner, in some respects it still feels like summer and the silly off-season.  The University of Miami has fully embraced the corrupt South Beach culture, or at least been finally and fully exposed.  Jordan Jefferson is using the same judgment off field as he does on the field.  Seems like the silly off-season will never end.   

But alas, the season is about to begin and what of the teams from the Big 12, how will they fare?

Oklahoma – With the amount of returning talent, the transition should go well.  Unfortunately, despite the Sooners wealth of talent, they are walking into a helluva tough schedule.  With road games at Florida, Alabama and LSU, they may be reconsidering their decision until the first paycheck rolls in.

Oklahoma State – the Cowboys really had no choice but to follow their brethren from Norman.  While OSU may have some large independent boosters, they couldn’t turn away to money from the new arrangement; T. Boone’s not going anywhere.  Their talent is plentiful and their coach is now approaching his mid-40’s, which should lend some maturity, or not.

Missouri – They may have lost their QB, but, like the great Texas State Armadillo quarterback Paul Blake once said, “they won just by stepping on the field”.  Missouri was spared the best teams in the East, but the West is tough enough.

Texas A&M – The great instigators.  The Aggies return almost their entire starting 22 from last season; a season that saw them win a portion of their division.  Unfortunately, LB is not a position you can afford to be weak at in this conference.  While A&M is being championed for their foresight, the shock of the transition may be overwhelming to the fan base.

What about the rest of the league?

Texas – Mack cleaned house, but has talent.  And Texas can recruit not only players but coaches as well.  The Longhorns will be fine on defense, but playing in an offense-dominated conference will put a lot of pressure on a unit without proven playmakers.  They are probably another year or two away from competing for a title.

Texas Tech – Unlike the Longhorns, the Raiders can put up points thanks to the recruiting efforts of Mike Leach.  Unfortunately, their defense is built for Arena Football and Leach isn't calling the plays.  They have minimal depth on the defensive line and the secondary is average.  Not a good combination.

The rest…really?  Do we care?

With the massive realignment during the summer of 2011, not only did the college landscape change, but my interest level as well.  Being fond of having been to every SEC stadium, I now have four more venues added to the list.  And while Columbia, Missouri may be more akin to Auburn, AL than Athens, GA, it’s an experience to savor.   I need to start planning for the trip to Norman in 2012; I’m open for suggestions on places to not miss.

Hmmmm, there are uncomfortable noises interrupting my thoughts...alarm clock you say?  What?  Wait, I was asleep?  Dreaming?  So Texas A&M, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Missouri haven’t joined the SEC?  Texas and Texas Tech haven’t left for the PAC-12/16?  The rest of the Big 10/12/9 haven’t been relegated to football purgatory?  All a dream you say…or is it?

Ok, since this was supposed to be a Big 12/10 preview, here are the picks.  Go to Vegas is you wish, but I suggest a Costanza-like “do the opposite” approach.

North

Oh wait, only 10 teams…

Big 12/10

Oklahoma – best returning QB and WR; young, but experienced defense…

Texas A&M – solid at all positions, but not great at any…

Oklahoma State – great potential, questions at the head-set position …

Texas Tech – great offense, suspect defense…

Missouri – lost great QB, but Pinkel has installed a self-sustaining system…

Texas – the great unknown…new staff allows for new beginnings…

Kansas State – Bill, you can’t go back home…

Baylor – The Southern Baptists may struggle to stay in the top of the bottom...

Iowa State – Still wondering why they didn’t properly “invest” in Chizik’s system…

Kansas – It’s flat, cold and barren and that’s just the co-ed’s…just kidding…

It's GAME WEEK!  Productivity plummets!

 Pick6

ESPN PIMPING INVESTMENT

So I flip on the tube tonight to find the College Gameday staff, including Corso, in Austin. I had to double check my calendar to make sure the college season is still a week away. Then it hit me. ESPN is pimping the launching of the Longhorn Network.

This completely signifies everything that is wrong with college football. What next, Vegas is going to start posting lines on high school football games?! Holy Shit....there are 15 high school games this weekend that Vegas has point spreads posted and open for betting.

Www.vegasinsider.com

But regardless of everything that is wrong, I will be tuning in tonight to watch Armwood high school play some Vegas high school team and watch Herby dissect the Texas defense.

I guess the football hungry fan will eat anything that the WWL will feed us no matter how rotten it is.

12 - Pack

  

So, it falls on me to preview the 12-pack, or as the infamous Mr. Murn coined it, “the twacker”. Like a true appetizer, a twacker is considered a good way to start. It won’t fuel the party all night, but it’ll start the ball rolling. The twacker hits the sweet spot in terms of portability. If you created a graph using content on the x-axis, and convenience on the y-axis, the twacker is the elbow in the curve. In a pinch, rip off the top and shove ice down the crevices….bingo – an instant cooler. Back in the day, you would grab a twacker at the Lil Champ, head down the road and drink all 12 before the beer got warm.

What? Oh, the Pac-12. Apologies.

Well, some of the same logic applies. It is college football by definition, but you cannot live on it alone. The P12 is like the Busch Lite Twacker, it is enjoyable, provides the most bang for your buck, but you never want to admit in public that you consume it. It fills a necessary gap with 10 pm kickoffs, and conference games are very underrated in terms of entertainment.

The conference has recently expanded, and they did a great job in not only adding programs that take the sport seriously, but they make sense geographically. The divisions are barely 9 months old, yet the average fan can easily name all 6 teams in each division (eyeing you Swofford, Delany).

Pac 12 North

Predicted Order of Finish:

1) Oregon

2) California

3) Washington

4) Stanford

5) Oregon State

6) Washington State

Oregon – This program is sooooo new money. They’ve teetered on the edge of national prominence for years, always being a Dennis Dixon knee away from true limelight. The uniforms befuddle anyone over 25, but the kids dig them. When something good goes away (Masoli, Rich Brooks, Belloti) they always plug in an improvement. They go for 2 in the 2nd quarter. The trend charts for UO are sloping in the right direction. With the return of James and Thomas, you just know they will throw 45 points up every night. With (justifiably) one of the best home atmospheres, and (NCAA alert) recent recruiting classes, this team will continue to set up camp in the BCS top 5. The toughest challenge will be opening night vs LSU, but even a stumble there may not prevent this team from going the BCS championship game again.

California – May be a reach at second, but they schedule is manageable. They get USC and Utah at home, which should be the difference between second and fifth. Tedford is a solid coach, and without a clearcut leader at QB and RB in the spring, they will have to rely on experienced defensive returning starters. Tedford finally got the hippies out of the trees, so getting back to 8 or 9 wins shouldn’t be that hard.

 

Washington – Yes, they lost Tebow-lite, but Sark has quietly built up a solid talent base in the past few years. I expect to see a well-rounded team surprise the rest of the conference.

Stanford – Even with perhaps the best player in the country, you simply cannot lose a coach as great as Harbough, and not falter. They lose 3 starters on the OL, and they were fantastic starters at that. There will be more pressure on Luck (literally), and he simply can’t do it all himself. I expect a big drop-off defensively.

Oregon State – This team is always a wild card. Riley can be fantastic on a single game basis, but he seems to have trouble getting good players in the trenches. Rodgers is gone, and he will be sorely missed.

Washington State – Have you ever been to Starkeville? It looks like Las Vegas compared to Pullman. The football team is even worse.

 

Pac 12 South

Predicted Order of Finish:

1) Utah

2) USC

3) Arizona State

4) Arizona

5) UCLA

6) Colorado

Utah – why not? Is there anyone else in this division that you can see that’s better? Wittingham has recruited very well, and continues to teach proper fundamentals. The wild card here is the addition of Norm Chow, who seems to have forgotten quite a bit during his stay in Westwood. If the new offense is implemented without many hiccups, you should see the new kids on the block in the inaugural championship game.

USC – it seems USC had prepared to use the song girls as there starting defense last year. With scholarship reductions, I don’t see elder Kiffin improving this screen door. Barkley is a great talent, but you can’t get the Lane stink off of you with hospital soap – ask anyone in

Knoxville.

Arizona State – if anyone is confused with the 12 pack – Pac 12 issue more than me, it is Dennis Erickson, who has never passed the Circle K without stopping for a slim-jim and a tall boy. Even so, Vontaze Burfict is so dangerous, he could play by himself on D and give up only 12 points a game.

Arizona – God bless Zona for their patience. Stoops wouldn’t have made it past season 2 at Vandy with these results. For a school that gets every hot girl in southern California (that didn’t get into USC or UCLA), you would think that you could get a few 4 star players.

UCLA – Tricky Ricky has an office pool for how long he’ll be able to hang on to his job. Since nobody had longer than December 2010, it’s now carried over into the “Jersey Shore” death pool. Fans wear blue sweaters to the Rose Bowl. Blue. Sweaters.

Colorado – Unbeknownst to many, Colorado wanted in the P-12 solely to keep the pipeline of Maui Wowii full. Tune into the September 10 game vs California and watch Ralphie fall over at the 45 yard line from a contact high.

Conference Champion: Oregon...duh

- Ocular Patdown

ACC Preview... Duke to win ACC Title!

What do the “Girls Next Door,” United Airlines, and the Democratic Party have in common?  They are all average at what they do, unreliable, look for ways to steal your money, artificially inflate their assets, and come up as synonyms for the ACC in the Thesaurus.  The Almost Competitive Conference (aka, “Atlantic Coast Conference”) is looking to continue a “tradition of excellence… then, now, and always.”  Is it me, or is this completely befuddling? 

1. When has the ACC had a tradition of excellence in football? 

2. Are they excellent now?

3. Will they even be around in 2015? 

The answers are “Almost Never; My sources say No; Don’t count on it.”  I double checked these responses with the Magic 8 Ball—twice.  If that isn’t a firm confirmation, maybe this is:  according to the ACC Football Media Guide, “ACC football is No. 1 in Academics.”  As the Switzer Principle asserts, “Football wins and Academic Performance maintain a permanent, inverse relationship.  I.E. fast people can’t do math.”  The Switzer Principle also states that Player Payroll and the number of Football Wins are positively related.  Interestingly, the ACC media guide isn’t reporting data on the number of hookers, abortions, yacht rides, or performance bonuses paid out to players over the last decade.  Are they embarrassed of the losses still piling up despite escalating payrolls at certain institutions?

If that wasn’t enough, the ACC has the Forest Gumption to claim “10 Football National Titles and Then Some…”  Want to know their source?  Wikipedia!!!  Please note: Wikipedia is the same source that one former ESPN staff writer used to report that FSU created Seminole Fire Water, which was then stolen by University of Florida professors and marketed as Gatorade.  Doesn’t the ACC know that anyone can edit Wikipedia?  Let’s not even mention that they are claiming 5 National Titles won by the U… which were won prior to the U joining the ACC.  Despite this conference’s character flaws (the greatest being its lack of football prowess) and in an attempt for personal growth, the Hare will strive to objectively review the ACC… despite the inherently difficult nature of such an assignment (Thanks to the Suits running this POTD Blog that assigned me this crap-hole conference!!!).  The only thing worse than this purgatory of an assignment would be previewing the Big Least…urgh…East.  Sorry Stasche… one day the suits will recognize our genius and we’ll get to cover a real conference.

                                                             

ACC

Defending Champ:  Virginia Tech

Best Tradition: Howards Rock and running down the Hill, Clemson.

Best College Town:  Raleigh-Durham-Chapel Hill triangle

Best Mascot:  Demon Deacon.  Does it get any better than a beer drinking, Baptist deacon, dressed to the nines like Bill the Butcher, riding into town on a Harley?… BTF Up Mudda Fuggas!

Worst Mascot:  Chief Osceola.  Does it get any more racist than a white man putting on Red Face, playing the caricatured role of a rebel Native American? 

Best Fight Song: “Ramblin’ Wreck from Georgia Tech”.  A song about cars, alcohol, college coeds, and a number of expletives… why did they ever leave the SEC?  

Best Campus:  Virginia Tech

Best Band:  Based purely on the names…

1. Duke University Marching Band (DUMB)
2. Screaming Eagles (of Boston College)
3. UM Band of the Hour (maybe the band is really a brothel that charges Shapiro by the hour? Make it Rain!)

 Team Previews:

Official University Name: Boston College

City: Chestnut Hill, MA

Home Stadium:  Alumni Stadium

Max Capacity:  44,500

Mascot (s):  Baldwin the Eagle

Colors: Maroon & Gold

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Mary Ann’s

Taste of the Town:  Eagle’s Deli

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  The Eagles finished 2010 with a 7-6 record and look to make improvements offensively.  Their schedule is back loaded, so expect BC to jump out to a quick start and fade disastrously down the stretch.  The Hare’s prediction: 5-7 and no bowl.

Official University Name: Clemson University

City: Clemson, SC

Home Stadium:  Memorial Stadium

Max Capacity:  80,301

Mascot (s):  The Tiger

Colors: Burnt Orange & Northwest Purple

The Unofficial Official College Bar: The Esso Club

Taste of the Town:  Tiger Town Tavern

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  Dabo Sweeney (Todd) is on the hot seat following a 6-7 showing in 2010.  Expect Sweeney to be unemployed following the October 1^st matchup with VT (Following consecutive losses to Auburn, FSU, and VT).  The Hare’s prediction: 7-5 and another bad coaching hire.

Esso Club

Official University Name: The Florida State University

City: Tallahassee, FL

Home Stadium:  Doak Campbell Stadium

Max Capacity:  82,300

Mascot (s):  Chief Osceola & Renegade

Colors: Garnet & Gold

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Bullwinkle’s Saloon

Taste of the Town:  Hopkin’s Eatery

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  Didn’t you hear?  The Seminoles are back.  Well, after saying this for almost 8 years now, ESPN might actually be right.  The 2011 edition of the FSU Seminoles is as talented a bunch as they’ve had in nearly a decade and their schedule is quite easy.  The Hare’s prediction: 11-1, but lose the ACC title game to (spoiler alert) VT.

Bullwinkle's

Official University Name: University of Maryland

City: College Park, MD                                     

Home Stadium:  Byrd Stadium

Max Capacity:  54,000

Mascot (s):  Testudo

Colors: Red & White

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Santa Fe Cafe

Taste of the Town:  Plato’s Diner

Premier Sport on Campus:  Basketball

2011 outlook:  Expect the Terrapins to be much like they always are, a near contender, but in the end, just another pretender.  The Hare’s prediction:  7-5.

Plato's Diner

Official University Name: North Carolina State University

City: Raleigh, NC                                                 

Home Stadium:  Carter-Finley Stadium

Max Capacity:  57,583          

Mascot (s):  Mr. Wuf

Colors: Red & White

The Unofficial Official College Bar: East Village

Taste of the Town:  El Rodeo

Premier Sport on Campus:  Cursing Duke and UNC

2011 outlook:  With the transfer of 2010 starting QB Russell Wilson to UW-Madison, the Wolfpack will be searching for a new identity on Offense.  Expect Tom O’Brien to keep this team competitive, but like the rest of the ACC, expect mediocrity.  That said, the schedule sets up nicely for an inflated number in the wins column.  The Hare’s prediction:  8-4

Official University Name: Wake Forest University

City: Winston-Salem, NC                                 

Home Stadium:  Groves Stadium

Max Capacity:  31,500          

Mascot (s):  Demon Deacon

Colors: Old Gold & Black

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Ziggy’s

Taste of the Town:  Burke Street Pizza

Premier Sport on Campus:  Basketball

2011 outlook:  From ACC Champs to ACC chum.  Wake Forest is set for another disastrous season where being less than mediocre allows for close loses that punish the fan base with misguided hope.  The Hare’s prediction:  1-10

Official University Name: Virginia Polytechnic Institute & State College

City: Blacksburg, VA                                          

Home Stadium:  Lane Stadium

Max Capacity:  66,233                           

Mascot (s):  Hokie Bird

Colors: Chicago Maroon & Burnt Orange

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Sharkey’s

Taste of the Town:  Big Al’s

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  The Defending ACC champs look to build on last season’s success with a possible BCS title game birth.  Given the depth and experience returning to the team and a schedule akin to the 2010 Auburn Tiger’s cupcake schedule, such aspirations are not out of the question.  The Hare’s prediction:  12-0 winning the ACC Title Game and playing for the BCS title.

Sharkey's

Official University Name: Georgia Institute of Technology

City: Atlanta, GA                                                 

Home Stadium:  Bobby Dodd Stadium

Max Capacity:  55,000                                        

Mascot (s):  Buzz

Colors: White & Old Gold

The Unofficial Official College Bar: O’Terril’s Pub

Taste of the Town:  The Varsity

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  Show me your triple veer option!  Who cares if GT sucks, watching this team play almost makes you think you could have played college football.  Looking to improve on the 2010 campaign, GT is poised for moderate success.  The Hare’s prediction:  7-5.

Official University Name:  University of Miami

City: Coral Gables, FL                                                 

Home Stadium:  Sun Life Stadium (Miami Garden’s, FL)

Max Capacity:  76,500                                        

Mascot (s):  Sebastian

Colors: Orange & Green

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Tobacco Road

Taste of the Town:  Mojito’s Cuban Cuisine

Premier Sport on Campus:  Football

2011 outlook:  Now that the NCAA has caught onto the use of prostitutes, drugs, and money to motivate players (wait… they are just now catching onto this?), it might be a tough year for the Canes.  On the other hand, the C-Victs might look at this as a way to stick it to the man.  The Hare’s prediction:  6-6.

Official University Name:  University of Virginia

City: Charlottesville, VA                                            

Home Stadium:  Scott Stadium

Max Capacity:  61,500                                        

Mascot (s):  Cavalier

Colors: Orange & Navy Blue

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Buddhist Biker Bar

Taste of the Town:  Take it Away Sandwich Shop

Premier Sport on Campus:  Undecided

2011 outlook:  Next to Duke, UVA might be the worst program in the ACC over the past 10 years.  However, expect major improvements with 2^nd year coach Mike London at the helm (London won a D1-AA championship at Richmond).  The Hare’s prediction:  6-6

Buddhist Biker Bar

Official University Name:  University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

City: Chapel Hill, NC                                                    

Home Stadium:  Kenan Memorial Stadium

Max Capacity:  63,000                                        

Mascot (s):  Rameses

Colors: Carolina Blue & White

The Unofficial Official College Bar: He’s Not Here

Taste of the Town:  Top of the Hill                

Premier Sport on Campus:  Basketball, followed by Women’s Soccer

2011 outlook:  This season is set up nicely for the Tar Heels.  The schedule is light, and they have quite a bit of motivation to avenge to loss of Butch Davis.  Expect history to repeat itself akin to Larry Coker at the U.  The Hare’s prediction:  9-3.

Top of the Hill Brew-Pub

Official University Name:  Duke University

City: Durham, NC                                                         

Home Stadium:  Wallace Wade Stadium

Max Capacity:  33,941                                        

Mascot (s):  Blue Devil

Colors: Duke Blue & White

The Unofficial Official College Bar: Charlie’s

Taste of the Town:  Cosmic Cantina             

Premier Sport on Campus:  Basketball, followed by Men’s Lacrosse

2011 outlook:  Duke will win the ACC Title… in basketball.  In Football, Duke Sucks…still.  The Hare’s prediction:  0-12.

7 Days until Football Season!

~March Hare~